This blog will hopefully be updated daily with my exploits but as I am off this weekend let me regale you with some things that have happened during the previous weeks.
1. A women comes in to the store at 7PM and says she needs to order a surveillance system. After a brief conversation she informs me that her husband has potentially killed her cat and that she wants to videotape him when/if he kills her dog. She currently has a spy in the house who has to some degree verified her suspicions about the cat. This is all information provided to me unprovoked. I try and be reassuring and explain to her our cameras and she continues to involve me in a byzantine narrative of cat autopsies, the man she is living with now, and her willingness to spend no more than $100 dollars.
2. A man in a motorcycle helmet (red) walks in. He has large man boobs and is extremely disheveled and frightening. He barks out an order for a VHS head cleaner, which I show him. He then pronounces, "I didn't ride all the way over here to pay $20 dollars for that". He then mumbles to himself while walking out.
3. A man described his foreskin tattoo to me
4. Old man buys a one way VHS rewinder (enough said)
5. I was told, "This isn't England god dammit, this is America"
6. I have also been told, "Soon we will be like the French and not able to do anything for ourselves."
7. Lots of people smell like cat pee, at first it was odd but now it just seems like a trend.
Stay posted for more details as they happen, now that I have the infrastructure off of the ground I will be more inclined to chronicle the greatness that my life has become.
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3 comments:
you should do a short story about the cat lady and her husband
*Other* people smell like cat piss? Dude, are you sure your not smelling your own shoes?
That's a misquote, I said, "Lot's of people.", which can be self inclusive.
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